Ramblings of an Armchair Skeptic

There are plenty of examples in the world that one could use as mighty fine reasons why intelligent design is a load of bunk. Your appendix, mosquitoes, Honey Boo Boo. Then there are parasites. I can't think of a good reason to create these paragons of ickiness except to give us just one more reason to look up gross things on the Internet to say ew about and make our skin crawl. There are some great ones in the animal kingdom that are just too bat shit crazy for words. An unsuspecting grasshopper could drink some bad water and get himself infected with a horsehair worm which will begin to busily grow inside him (up to a foot long!) until the worm decides he wants out. But he needs to live in water and since grasshoppers aren't fond of swimming the worm simply takes control of the grasshopper's brain, marches him to the nearest body of water, compels him to commit a horrible watery suicide and then casually slithers out of his ass. For real. Out of his ass. The Leococ...

I shall dedicate my continuing pseudomedical Cracked series to my dear, sweet, sexy man.  5. QuWave Defender It's okay, you can tell me. I'm not going to judge you. I'm here to help. I know you are a targeted individual suffering from electronic harassment, psychotronic, and psychic attacks. You are not alone. There is hope! For over 60 years targeted individuals (TIs) such as yourself have been trying to escape mind control torture. That's right...TORTURE! These mind control torturers use psychotronic weapons just to mess you up. These weapons are designed to leave you feeling stressed out, disoriented, drowsy, helpless, and paranoid. Yes, because THEY have nothing better to do with their time and money except to make you feel like shit. Celebrating 60 years of fucking with your mind The good folks at QuWave have the solution for you! The QuWave Defender uses BOTH scalar and Solfeggio energies to not only thwart those nasty psychic attackers but to also h...

I dedicate this continuing Cracked edition to the sweet and lovely Katie because she asked for more. And she's awesome. 3. Rebirthing I have both been born and given birth. Of these two events, I can vividly recall one of them. The other, not so much. Proponents of rebirthing however, think that we all have repressed memories of squishing down the birth canal ourselves and that this traumatic experience has shaped our personalities and is the reason for any strife that we have with ourselves or loved ones. Which, unless you were born by bursting out your mother's chest and immediately latching on to the nearest person's face, I don't think any trauma that may have occurred would be even remotely in the realm of remembering. Hell, I can barely remember what I did last week. Ripley, say hello to your little brother. Nonetheless, a rebirthing practitioner can help you remember this trauma which then lets you work through any issues that you have now. If your ...

Since So many of you wrote me to tell me how much you loved my Cracked post and wanted more, I am happy to oblige. Alright, I heard from exactly no one so I'm just going to go ahead and pretentiously assume that you all loved it so much and are silently screaming out for more. 'Cause that's how I roll. Sort of. So I shall delve into some more pseudoscientific medical claims and try to crack open a bit of truth. But I grow weary of the usual acupuncture and homeopathy nonsense that is so ubiquitous. Today I will tell you about some of the even more alternative alternative medicines. Here's two to get you started, more to follow shortly. I know you believe me when I say that there's some wacky shit that people think can cure what ails you. So shut up and buckle up, we're taking another ride, Cracked style. 1. Urine Therapy  Yes, this is totally as gross as it sounds. Either drinking urine or rubbing it on one's skin, you can count me out on this one...

As we mosey through our insignificant little lives, we try to find a bit of meaning therein. Some people find it through the connections and relationships they cherish. Some through religion, community or career. And then there are those who discover meaning and joy in selling useless crap to gullible folks. The lovely webmasters at Inner Soul Technologies have certainly gone that route. I've been to several trade shows and Mind, Body, Wallet Expos and there are always plenty of purveyors of woo but one thing I noticed about them when we chat is that most of them seem to truly believe that what they are selling actually does what is claimed. A very nice and verbose magnetic jewelry hawker went on and on about the benefits of magnets. I imagine he must be the healthiest person in the world being surrounded with that much magnetism all day long! One lady at an expo enthusiastically waved her pyramid around my friend and aligned her chakras with great sincerity. I shall not give th...

It appears as though I have been very delinquent in my posting. My sincere apologies to my 5 readers. I shall strive to update somewhat more regularly. And so I shall begin with this. If you've never been to Cracked.com , you should go. It's an engaging website that is both funny and enlightening at the same time. I have spent many an hour LOLing at their crazy antics. Of course I know that my paltry writing skills will never compare but I thought I would take a crack (pun intended) at the same style of prose. I'm hoping some of you may even crack a smile (okay okay, I'll stop). So I present to you here, my top 5 list (in no particular order) of silly woo medical stuff, ala Cracked, complete with obligatory elevated snark level. Let me know if you like it and I will attempt to write more of the same. 5. Homeopathy The Myth: Like cures like. What the heck does that mean you ask? It means that a disease can be cured by a substance that produces similar symptoms ...